Not Everything You Think is True: The Power and Limitations of Your Thoughts

Believe it or not, not everything we think is true.  As Alan Watts once said, “Our thoughts are useful in moderation, a good servant with a bad master” meaning that if we aren’t mindful of our thoughts, they can spiral out of our control and get the best of us. 

In this last segment of the Accomplishment Pathway, we’ll be discussing how our thoughts have the power to influence and shape our reality. Thoughts can either propel you towards success and accomplishment, or they can keep you stuck where you are, it all depends on the quality of your thoughts. 

Thoughts Shape Your Reality

“The greatest weapon against stress is our ability to choose one thought over another” William James

Tune into the stories you’re telling yourself

Your brain is a storytelling machine, it loves when all the pieces of the puzzle fit together. One of the ways we try to make sense of things is to tell ourselves stories about what’s happening and what might happen next. Over time these stories become beliefs you hold and shape the way you feel and act.

Start listening to the stories you’re telling yourself, particularly when you’re feeling anxious, overwhelmed, or upset, and notice the impact they have on you. Some of the stories we may tell ourselves can undermine our resilience and achievement such as:

•  “Not being good enough” generally makes us feel embarrassed, leaving us desperate to withdraw from the world around us.
•  “That’s not fair” generally makes us feel angry, lash out, and displace blame.
•  “This is going to be bad” generally makes us fearful, escalating our levels of anxiety and panic.
•  “I’m such a loser” generally makes us feel sad and retreat.

These stories get triggered when we face adversities, challenges, or new experiences in an attempt to protect ourselves from potential harm.  The problem is that when we feed into these thoughts too often they chip away at our confidence, self-esteem, motivation, and drive. These types of stories paralyze progress. 

How to Redirect Your Thoughts

You have the power to change your thoughts and change your reality as a result. When we approach our life experiences with objective curiosity, self-awareness, and compassion we can learn to unravel the unhelpful stories we tell ourselves and begin to feel like we’re in charge again. 

When you notice these negative stories come up:  

• Challenge the beliefs that hold you back by asking yourself, “Is this story really true?”, and go even further by asking “where’s the proof?”
• Lean into your pain and the fear of adversity and notice how when you make space for these emotions to come up, they eventually pass.
• Ban “Always” from your vocabulary – the words “always” and “never” are signs that your stories have gotten stuck.  Neither of these extremes is usually true and, in most cases, we’re likely to fall somewhere on the ‘sometimes’ scale.
• Flex your mindset. Stress is neither good nor bad, it’s how you respond that impacts the results you get.  If you address stress through healthy coping strategies, then you learn to see it as a neutral part of life. 
•  Practice self-compassion. What would a wise and kind coach say to you in the moments you fall short? 
• In the midst of failure or frustration, write yourself a letter from the perspective of a wise and compassionate friend.
• Soothe your pain by sitting with it and breathing deeply and slowly.

At the end of each day or week, write down all your wins, savor the feeling you get, and reflect back on them often to remind yourself that you’re more capable than you realize and stronger than you think. 

By honoring your emotions and being kind to yourself, you can begin to reframe your whole life experience. You can learn to accept yourself as the beautifully imperfect and complex being that you are, and give yourself the grace to fail and make mistakes as you persevere.

You have the ability to keep going, putting one foot in front of the other, even when fear and doubt say you can’t.

Keep going, keep growing…

Related posts:

How To Embrace a Growth Mindset to Accomplish More in Life

Fighting Failure With Grit: Building the Perseverance to Accomplish Your Goals